This is something that is close to my heart. I was sitting here wondering what in the world to write about (I have a list of over 40 blog post topics I want to write about but my decision making skills are REALLY bad) when I thought about Daddy not being here tonight again. So now I’m listening to the My Little Pony version of Katy Pery’s California Gurls (and an assortment of other MLP songs 😀 ) and writing something I think ALL littles/babygirls should read and take to heart.
PS. You can find the MLP California Gurls parody here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OiKWSYwj8KM
I HIGHLY recommend it for Littles and Daddies alike, it ALWAYS makes me smile!
(A little background information: I do NOT get along with my Daddy’s family at all, I’m not going to go into detail but they make me miserable and unhappy and from time to time they make me cry so I don’t visit them with him anymore)
Something that is hammered into Daddies across the board is to be understanding. Understand when your babygirl is like this, be understanding when your little is going through this or that. It is all over the place but one thing I have yet to come across is somewhere or something that tells littles to be more understanding of certain situations, obligations and responsibilities that Daddies have or go through. So I am making a stand and writing this for the sake of Daddies all over.
Yes, babygirls are sensitive little bunnies, we feel deeply, we get hurt easily and we take things to heart. Yes, Daddies do need to be extra understanding in order to care for, deal with and make littles happy. However, I sometimes think that babygirls can take advantage of that, after all, we’re babygirls and that makes being selfish, bratty, demanding and the like perfectly OK, right?
A Daddy can only be so understanding, he can take only so much before his patience and understanding wear thin. Even if he has the world’s patience and understanding for his babygirl, when you are demanding, nag, whine and kick up a fuss about things that he has no control over it makes his life miserable. No Daddy wants his little to be unhappy but sometimes he has to leave you or he can’t be there or spend time with you because he has responsibilities and obligations that need his attention. I feel for every little that doesn’t live with her Daddy and/or has to deal with sharing his attention and time with other obligations, people and responsibilities. I really do.
Monster doesn’t and I don’t live together and, even though we work in the same office, half of the time outside of work he spends away from me. Long story short, he has a daughter, he boards with his parents, and he has very strong family ties. These are all things that take up a lot of his time, take him away from me and take up a lot of his attention. It is MY responsibility to be as understanding as I can, as hard as it may be sometimes, so that I don’t make his life a living hell all the time that he is away from me.
I am not saying that you are not allowed to feel sad or to miss him. That is a natural part of being apart from your Daddy. What I am saying is to understand that he has obligations, there are other people who are important to him to whom he will give attention and he has other responsibilities outside of you.
Talk About Your Feelings:
Communication is EXTREMELY IMPORTANT! As a babygirl, you need to communicate your feelings to your Daddy as best you can. Let him know that it is hard for you when you are apart and that you miss him very much but do it in a positive way. If you don’t tell your Daddy what you are feeling and you walk around a little grumpy or sad, he won’t always know why. This can be very bewildering for Daddies, after all, they want their little princesses to be happy and they don’t know what to do with themselves if they don’t know why you are unhappy in the first place.
Here is an example of a Whatsapp chat I had with Daddy yesterday evening after he left to go home because he had chores to do and animals to care for while his parents weren’t home:
Your Daddy cannot get angry with you for being sad or a little grumpy when he isn’t around and I am not saying that you aren’t allowed to be. I’m not even saying that you can’t be a teensy weensy bit jealous of the people he wants to spend time with and you can’t be with, if that is ever the case. What he has every right to get angry with is when you show more anger towards him than is fair, when you are overly sulky or moody and do things specifically to make him feel bad while he is away from you.
Find Things To Do:
Find hobbies and things to do to pass time in a positive way. Visit friends, paint, colour, go shopping, play a sport, do things that will keep you happy and busy in a healthy way and take your mind off the fact that your Daddy isn’t there with you.
Just To Sum It Up:
- Don’t sulk
- Don’t whine
- Don’t pester him with whiney/sulky texts or phone calls
- Don’t make him feel bad about having to be away from you (trust me, he feels bad enough already without you adding to it)
- Don’t show anger towards him
- Don’t throw tantrums
- Do communicate your feelings in a way that is both constructive and positive, you are allowed to say that it makes you sad
- Do have hobbies and positive outlets for your feelings like drawing, painting, visiting friends, things that make you happy and take your mind off how much you miss him
- Do remind yourself that you will see him again soon
- You are allowed to feel an assortment of emotions such as sadness, anger, bewilderment, a teeny tiny bit of jealousy but not so much that it turns you into a green little monster
- You are allowed to send him little texts telling him that you miss him or give him a quick phone call to hear his voice and say that you can’t wait to see him again (letting him know that you miss him in a positive way does cause pangs of longing but it’s also very nice to know that he is missed when he is gone)
- You are allowed to cry, crying can be a good thing when you let out the tears instead of bottling your emotions up but you don’t have to use your tears to make your Daddy feel even worse than he already does
It is important to remember that your Daddy is only human and he does have things that will take him away from you or take up some of his attention. Make things easier for him by trying your very best to be understanding, tell him if you are sad or angry but don’t make things difficult for him. Find positive and constructive ways to spend your time apart that will make you happy and take your mind of your sadness and how much you miss him. Most of all, look forward to the next time you will see him!